first post

for a while now i've been thinking of moving away from tumblr.. it's become a mess of images/quotes from people i don't know/nor care about. also feels increasingly jarring to send out long text posts where i write about my mental health & other weird things i'm processing in therapy and see that in the timeline amongst memes / jokes / stanposts from other users. always feel like i'm interrupting that flow with my emotions & sincerity, even if others have chosen to follow me

in general, i guess i would just like a quieter space to write again, one that feels entirely my own. i already feel better typing here

scrambled my username so you wouldn't find it unless you knew the url ie. i can write in a more open way. also don't know anyone who still uses blogspot, which is fine with me. feels cute & old school to go back to this interface & if someone wants to read this they have to bother visiting this url

things i will post about here: boring updates about my day... boring updates about what i ate and cooked... figuring out my mental health... things i cried about in therapy... reviews of whatever i watched/read/bought.. photos of my cat, my plants, things i thought were beautiful, things i thought were ugly, nothing in particular

in general one of the things that i've come to realise this year is how writing is one of my main/only constructive coping mechanisms that help me to process and integrate traumas/triggering memories into a relatively healthier psychological framework.. rather than leaving those memories & images frozen as blocks that i avoid thinking about, which only results in me feeling emotionally disconnected from myself and other people

and therefore... i should pursue writing, even if i feel like it's stupid to spend all this time thinking about myself; it's just for myself anyway

will leave comments open if anyone wants to interact with me i am here
also there seems to be a subscribe button above but i'm not sure how that works